Emma’s Journal

The children are getting better, still has a bit of a cold, but croup is definately gone. I however have their cold now

I just finished my interview presentation that i have on wednesday..i don’t really feel that it is very good, but whatever, i have it my best shot. My weakness is definately lack of confidence in my writing skills.

work is going well, i’m back tomorrow for 4…oh well….hopefully i’ll hear about a start date for my NICU course within the next week.

The last 2 nights have been fun-filled with croup…both the babies had it. Poor Ava…everytime she would fall asleep..she’d wake herself up coughing….and the sound…oh my….it would scare the crap out of her…then she would say that she felt she couldn’t breathe…then out on the step we would go….2am….3am….5am…then finally i gave up to my bed and let her father take over the shift…i stayed with Nolan..he’s much better to stay with…when he coughs he just goes back to sleep. Ava gets so anxious with it. Anyway….yesterday I got them a cool-mist humidifier and what a difference that made…i put it in with Ava last night and she slept all night and bam..croupy voice/cough is much improved today…maybe it’s just run its course but she sounds great and is in a much better mood.

Today marks my last day of vacation….:( i’m so sad..i don’t really want to go back to work tomorrow……they are saying it’s quite heavy there…i guess there are a few COPD-ers full of pneumonia, ventilated…so makes for a long shift….oh well….i’m crossing my fingers the neonatal course starts soon…there is an expected start date of the 22nd of feb. Oh i’m hoping…that’ll be so much easier on the back….

Since i’ve been introduced to highspeed/wireless….i can’t believe how i survived without it!
I think that now we have it i may start blogging more….something that i miss doing..just didn’t have the patience for it..when i had crap-dial-up. I spent alot of time yesterday catching up on old blogs….lots of people are having babies again!

Just have a few days off….i take my NRP course on Friday..it’s just a one day thing…then in about 2 weeks the NICU course will start…I can’t wait for that…of course nothing in my life is simple…i have an interview for a assistant manager position on the 10th…..I want the NICU course…because that’s where i’ve always wanted to work…but the assistant job would be great too…just the hours….no weekends…holidays off…but with NICU…there’’s always 4 -5 days off in a row…oooohhh the decisions….right now..i know nothing more about this other than the interview….i haven’t gotten the offer so that is what i am going with…continue the course that i was fortunate to get accepted into and do the interview…there are only 3 people they are interviewing…so i have a fairly good chance at it….. it’s a presentation for 10minutes….i hate presentations but i’ll do my best and give it a go!

Anyway, not much else here other than snow and more snow…we had such a great winter so far and than bam last week got some snow..now it’s super cold…anyway…will post again soon.

Well it’s been ages since i last posted. What have we all been up to? Not too much…just about the same. The children are all getting so big now. Nolan just turned 2 in December. I will have to start blogging again now that we are actualy going to get highspeed access next week! yay!

With work, I am still working in CCU…. but I am taking a neonatal ICU course starting the first week of February…I’m so excited..the unit mgr told me this is my in to OBS/NICU…So happy! Anyway, i’m going to go now, and leave you all with some pictures. Enjoy!

Oiy, another day of moodiness…
Just waiting for a call from the nurse to start on remicade…i’m hoping i’m one of the fortunate ones that go in remission within a few rounds…hopefully not one that has a severe reaction…i think it makes it worse being a nurse working adn caring for people with severe sepsis, chf and other of the bad reactions…

Yah, that’s what i am, a raging, hormonal, crazed bitch. The high doses of the prednisone is driving me crazy. I’m not getting any relief from the pain, i’m only getting super mad at everything. I don’t have patience…i’m so easily agitated and want to scream at EVERYONE and Everything! I’m so upset at how i feel i’m tempted to just wean off VERY quickly, because i don’t like how i feel. This rollercoaster of moods is really getting to me….ugh~

Aside from this, i have immersed myself in the soo..k..ie…St..ack..house books (t.ru.eb.l00d ser.ies) I’m what i would call addicted to them now. They certainly don’t have me loving them as much as Tw.,il.ight, but nonetheless they are a good read with some much needed raunch scenes in them

As my title of the post says…I’m exhausted!
I started this journal back when i was preggo with my 4th, I also journaled about my crohn’s disease and how often i had flare ups and my treatments and whatnot.

Well about 6 weeks ago, i relapsed into another wonderful flare up of my guts. I was on prednisone 50mg, and then tapered. Of course this time in 5 weeks it didn’t get any better. Now my hgb is in the low 90’s, I’m insanely tired. I”m off work on sick leave for a couple of weeks. I am seeing a new GI guy at work. He works internal med, so we have him admit cardiac pts. He’s so nice, so he’s easy to talk to that ’s for sure.
Basically, he’s diagnosed me with crohn’s/colitis. Yep, leave it to me to have both…and said that i’m steroid dependant which isn’t helping for the moment. So he gave me 3 options. Imuran, methotrexate or go to remicade or humira. The side effects from all are bad, but of course not treating properly is bad too. (in bad i mean cancer causing, rare form of lymphoma) So feeling as ill as i am, walking around like talking dead, i’ve opted for remicade. I haven’t started it yet, just waiting to have my CT and CXR done. I’m scared of course, but the imuran would take another 3 months before i may feel better. I can’t go on like this much longer. Anyway, sorry about the whiney post, just for my records and whatever.

I worked a 12 hr backshift last night…..it was quite the eventful shift needless to say.
One thing i haven’t blogged about lately is that I have accepted a job in coronary care, as opposed to intensive care. It is basically the same, well qualifications and whatnot it is the same, just not as much vents and longterm patients.
Anyway, i get on shift last night, the nurse i was relieving wasn’t there, she was up on the floors with a patient that had arrested earlier, when one of us arrives, a critical care nurse has to stay until transfer to icu/ccu. Anyway, we were the only ones with an empty bed so the transfer would come to me. I came up and sadly to say, the family were around, basically letting the patient live until all the family members arrived. So i come back downstairs to find my nurse so she can give me report on my other patient. She does so, and gives me an update about my other patient i had the night before. He came in with a new MI, anyway, coughing, sob, o2 sats were fine, just really restless and pretty much giving all the warning signs of spiraling down the shitter quickly. Needless to say he was airlifted out with cardiogenic shock and died 4 hrs later. Quite sad, he was a very nice man.
After i get my blurb, check my chart, a code blue in rec.room is called overhead, of course on the code team off i go, it’s an 8yr old boy, airway obstruction….thank goodness they were quick calling it and it was bascially just manually ventilation and drugs to calm him. THat wouldn’t have been good to see something go wrong…i don’t mind seeing 80 odd yr olds die, but children….nope. So off i go back to my unit.
Maybe a half hr later another code blue announced, up on a surgical floor. I arrived with the other nurses and begin compressions, my arms feel as though they are going to fall off as i type. Poor lady, was 80 some yrs old, ca of the lung, etc, no code status was addressed prior to this, so after 15 minutes later, many attempts at IV’s and whatnot, the dr. decided to call it.
So i get back to my unit, take care of my patient, get my empty bed ready for some kind of admission, (*hopefully it would stay empty*) and sit around doing my checks hrly.
AT 3 am i get another MI, ant/septal infarct. He had TNK and was having frequent f&*ked up arrythmia’s. Anyway, he ended up doing fine but i thought i was going to have deja vu from the night before since he presented pretty much the same as the other fella. ANyway, just thought i’d blog about this craziness, so i could unwind and get tired before going to sleep.